I'm in that place. I'm in a desert (literally and figuratively). Granted it hasn't been 40 years and I can only pray it won't last nearly that long! But I'm there. It's a place where I have a choice. And if I'm being completely honest, I all too often choose the wrong one.
My flesh is constantly in the way. I want control. I want things to go my way. But deep down in my heart I do desire to eat the mystery. I thirst to fill my soul with the inexplicable: God's provisions, not my plan. God's way, not mine.
Most of it I may never understand. I don't know why He allows us to experience turmoil and heartache or why He sometimes leads us into these seasons of waiting. But I do know that in the desert, I thirst. I hunger. I long for Him. And instead of complaining about it, instead of grumbling and wishing it were another way, I am going to choose to gather that which is baffling. Because that which is baffling from the Lord, far outweighs me trying to write my own story.
As I read chapter one of one thousand gifts, I was reminded of how faithful God has been to me in previous seasons like this one. This is not my first time in the proverbial desert. I've been led here many times before. I've relied on Him and seen His plan change me, change my aching, grumbling, ungrateful heart. I know in my core that He's doing it again. And as much as my flesh wants to fight Him, wants to do things my own way, I will not give in. I will choose to follow His lead.
I anticipate that reading this book will help break me in places of pride and continue to guide me during this time where I'm experiencing God's work to humble me. Chapter one has already begun to. And there are still ten more to read!
I'll be linking up with Annie and Margaret as we read through one thousand gifts together. Won't you join us??